Swear Words

I bet you are wondering what on earth I have to say about swear words. As well you might. If you know me personally, you would know that I do not swear. Okay, so I do say 'crap.' But that's about as graphic as it gets. I grew up in a home that didn't use swear words, and was taught that there's always a much more descriptive, better word you could use to express your feelings than a swear word. I have sworn a couple of times in the past 18 months. Once at some pasta spaghetti that just would not stay in the collander. It insisted on spilling over into the sink while I was trying to rinse it. Not a big deal, really. Yeah, except when you have a newborn baby, are getting an average of 5 hours sleep in every 24, are studying full time, and are just a bit beyond anything rational. The spaghetti got the brunt of my anger, because it was safer than exploding at anything else and it just happened to be the 'straw that broke the camel's back' as the saying goes. And as I did not really feel any better for it, swearing has remained something I don't generally do. So why talk about swearing? Well, my son was this week. He's not quite 11 months old, so a little young to be heading down that route. I said to him, "Munchkin, please stop using my name as a swear word!" He had been standing at the gate to our conservatory, saying "Mum, mum, mum, mum, mum!" Or rather, whinning, "Mum, mum, mum, mum, mum!" Why is it that Daddy gets the "Dada!" said with ecstasy and delight each morning, and I get the whinging, whining, moaning, and complaining? The only time he says my name is when he wants something. Grrr. Motherhood is so over rated. Or is that under rated? The pay is appaling at any rate. So honestly, it sounded just a little bit too much like swearing to me. You know, that mumbling under your breath when things don't go right kind of swearing. I am looking forward to the day when Munchkin decides to use my name as a happy word, rather than a complaining one. In the meantime, I will endeavour to instil in him the fact that there are plenty of words in the English language that can be used to describe feelings of tiredness, grumpiness, impatience, boredom, or otherwise, so he really can use something other than "Mum!" Amy Sunday, 17th April, 2011

Pocket Money

After a recent chat with some friends about pocket money for kids (or allowances, or whatever you prefer to call them), I found myself thinking about it again, and wondering what we will do with Munchkin. I never really had pocket money as a kid...there wasn't a great deal spare to go around so that was one thing we just didn't regularly have.

Someone I know gives their kid (about 10-11yrs old) $5 each week. It doesn't seem like much, especially as part of the deal in that particular situation is that the child has to give 10% (50c) and save 50% ($2.50) which doesn't leave them much left to spend. In today's society, $2 can disappear awfully fast!

Then I stopped and realised that this child receives almost as much pocket money a week as I do! I am 29 years old, and get $25 a month. Yup. $25 a month (which is about $6-7 a week). That's all mine. I can do whatever I want with it. The rest of our budget is not for me to do whatever I want with...not even any spare change from the groceries or parking meter money. We are living pretty tight, so this is kind of how it has to be. But in saying that, we instigated pocket money about 5 years ago. It is very useful. It helps keep you accountable in other areas - leaving more money for family goals and needs, as you fulfill your own wants with your own allowance. Anita Bell suggests a Sanity Allowance in her books about housing (How to Pay off a Mortgage in 5 Years by Someone Who Did it in 3). In her suggestion, each person buys clothes, personal food, birthday presents, etc out of it - basically anything not a fixed bill. We run our budget a bit differently. Things like birthdays and clothing are a budgeted expense. Personal items like shampoo or deodorant come out of grocery money. So our pocket money is really just for splurging on personal desires. When we first did it, I had MILE long list of things I just HAD to have. Over time, the pull of that list has diminished. I am learning to live in contentment with much less than I ever used to think I could. It is a long journey, and one I am sure is not over yet. Sometimes I wonder what the point is. Why can't I have, or at least want, more? But I realise that in order to do some of the things I feel God has made me for, I am going to need to show good stewardship. Having less 'stuff' also frees me to focus on other things - instead of cleaning all my knick-nacks, I can be spending time with a friend, or knitting another peggy square for orphans, or being outside getting some much needed exercise and being refreshed by the outdoors.

We really like having our own allowance each. It gives just a little bit of freedom to be frivolous. Not very frivolous, mind you, but enough to help ward off the constant 'I wants' of modern society. I must admit that when we were earning well in our last year before returning from North QLD to NZ, we did increase our pocket money to $50 each a month. Bliss. It would be nice to have enough to buy 1 cd or 1 average priced book a month (i.e. $35 a month) but I can't see that happening anytime soon. Grin. In the meantime, I am at present very happily squirrelling my pocket money away to build a chook cage. It will take 6 month, and I'm maybe almost halfway there.

Back to pocket money for kids. $5 a week doesn't sound so bad to me now that I realised I don't get much more than that. I really like the ideas that Eilleen at Consumption Rebellion has regarding pocket money. Her kids have to show that they understand what money is and how to manage it (like counting 1s, 5s, and 10s and having a longerterm savings goal). I imagine we might do something similar to this, once Munchkin is older. He will be expected to do household chores just because he is part of the family, although I imagine his dad will probably come up with a few 'extras' he can do to earn more cash (like washing the car - might mean it gets done more than biannually!).

Did you/do you give your kids or yourself pocket money? What are the benefits, do you think?

Amy

Sunday, 17th April, 2011

Autumn

I have just been cutting up fallen apples...a job intended for last Thursday when I brought them home from the Big Garden. They have been sitting in a bucket on the bench, rotting, since then. Gross. But I did at least still get to use some of them, despite the belated attention.

As I cut apples, I realised that I like autumn. Now this is a bit of a revelation because I have always preferred spring. Cute little lambs, daffodils, a hint of warmth creeping into the sun air (can you tell I feel the cold?!). Spring has always been my favourite season. But today I realise that I like autumn. I like how the air is getting cooler at night, and it is so nice to go walking during the day without expiring from heat exposure. The air is cool, but the sun is still oh, so nice and warm. Mostly though, I think my new-found love of autumn is to do with food. You see, in spring the garden is barely getting started. I have punnets upon punnets on our warm window sill, with tomatoes and capsicums poking their heads through the soil. But out in the garden, there's hardly anything to eat. Food takes time. That's one thing I'm learning. While I am ready to eat tomatoes in September, in reality they take until January to be ready (unless you're using a heated glasshouse). Our capsicums have only really come into their own at the end of March! There's also hardly any fruit around in spring. A few oranges and mandarins left over from autumn. You're still waiting for the first spring strawberries. Autumn, on the other hand, is a season of abundance! This is why I love autumn. There is fruit galore. Vegetables are still fairly plentiful too. Our climbing bean plant has just finished its summer-long production marathon and will be pulled out this week. There are heaps of pumpkins for soup and still greens for salads. We are eating the very last of the grapes and raspberries. The apples might last a couple more weeks, but the feijoas are only just starting. I can so understand why in times gone by late summer and early autumn would be spent canning, bottling and storing the summer's bounty in the cellar! It is a great time of year!

Amy

Tuesday, 12th April, 2011

Mealtimes

Munchkin has started choosing food for himself! He currently gets presented with a plastic plate, which he can eat from in his highchair. Because he loves eating so much, this works really well...the plate usually manages to stay in an upright position on the highchair tray with the food on top(with a Mummy intervention or two). He loves being able to choose what to eat and how to eat it. It is rather interesting to note that he currently eats like his Daddy. He picks one food, and eats all of that, before moving on to the next one (Mummy, on the other hand, is a grazer - eating a bit of that then a bit of this all in a rather more random manner!).

Here are some recent Munchy samplings:

Amy

Monday, 11th April, 2011

Rearranging

I have been feeling a little frustrated lately. I think it might be to do with being so tired, all the time. The study/baby/work juggle seems a little beyond me, still recovering from my second cold in as many months (or has it been less months than colds?!). We want to get Munchkin a table and chairs for his birthday, which is in a couple of months. Only we don't have anywhere to put it. So we've been considering other gift ideas instead. We need to get him more nappies as he's outgrown another set (this is not a birthday present, this is just something else he needs - note to self: tall kids cost a lot more to feed and clothe than the average!) and there's bootees and another set of onesie bummsies to get still too...and no $$ with which to get them. I get a bit frustrated when I can't 'find' money from somewhere for things like this. So what did I do? I tried rearranging the furniture this week. As I wrote to my sister-in-law:"...looked at a desk going into our bedroom for Andrew to study while Michael is up...yeah, that won't work without us having to climb over it to get into bed! So then I tried rearranging the lounge furniture just because I'm bored with it. Took photos. Will put it back how it was again today because I don't like it enough! Silly narrow living area. Silly big furniture. Silly students with desks and a baby! Grin...I've had to give up for now..." I have also managed to consume half a block of Whittakers Caramel Milk Chocolate in the past 2 days. Not a great idea. It did taste nice. I could totally go for some more now, but as I can't eat chocolate anytime after about 3pm without being wired all night, I am refraining. The thing is that I KNOW that it doesn't make me feel better. I just always hope it will! And figure that if I'm going to feel miserable and/or frustrated, it may as well be with a bit of chocolate romancing my taste buds. I think I am just feeling frustrated over all with our lives. With the monotony of it, and the dreariness of struggling to pay bills and clothe ourselves (Boyo needs shoes, I need slippers, and then there are those jolly nappies again!). I keep forgetting that the reason I can't just wander off and live some of my big-time dreams is because I am in fact living some! I wanted a child really badly. I have a gorgeous son! I wanted to do something as a career, that I felt passionate about and am gifted at, and here I am studying an Early Years teaching degree and really enjoying it. I have to remind myself that life is about seasons, and we simply can't experience them all at once. It would be too confusing! So because I am experiencing these two major dreams, many of the others are on hold for now...they will come at a later season. A snipet from this morning's sermon at church made me want to plug my ears and hum ("hmmm, I can't hear you, I can't hear you, not listening, hmmm..."). It was: "There is no easy road to the Promised Land." The context was referring to Caleb's life and how long he held onto a dream and waited with passion while almost everyone else around him doubted its possibility...and he did get to live his dream, but he had to go through desert and waiting first. No magic carpet. No pot of gold at the end of a rainbow. Just hard work, and trusting, and continuing to walk one step at a time in the right direction. Not exactly inspiring when you're tired and worn out. But true. I look at many of the things I want to do in life, and I know that my life will be so much more relevant and useable for having gone through hard times like now. But that still doesn't mean I don't hope for a way of escape! I think today God was reminding me that there might not be one, and that might be okay. I can hold onto the dreams. They aren't going anywhere unless I let them. Amy Sunday, 10th April, 2011

Peace and Quiet

"Peace!" said Daddy, "Peace!" said Mummy. "Milk!" said Munchkin. This miniature poem was written last night, as Munchkin happily guzzled his evening milk. After a day fraught with grizzling, whinning, and outright tears, it was a blessed moment of peace and quiet. Our boy is always on the go and the past week has been somewhat harrowing due to yet another cold doing the family round. I think I might have the makings of a good picture book, don't you?! Amy Sunday, 10th April, 2011

Taking a Moment

I love watching the sun set or rise. The colours are amazing! I must admit to being rather preoccupied with other things most of the time though, and usually my 'viewing the sunset' these days equates to a brief glimpse out one window or other, and a "Wow, that is gorgeous, Lord!" before I carry on tidying up, studying, or other urgent matters. I am trying to remind myself that I really do have a couple of minutes available to linger and refresh my eyes and my soul. There's something particularly special about the early evening for me. I think it has to do with this exhaling of breath, as if the day is almost done and I can start to relax. I love the song of the thrush and blackbird in the dusk, and the way cool or crisp slowly creeps into the evening air. Here is a recent glimpse of sunset from our house (photo taken by Boyo). Don't you just love the oranges?! I honestly don't think anything we can make as humans rivals the incredible world around us. It is beauty: inescapable, indescribable and yet so easily overlooked in our busy lives. Amy Saturday, 9th April, 2011