One could never claim a cold is stingy.
Nope. Never stingy.
Here, have some of my bounty! Let me SHARE with you.
What, you don't want a runny nose, a pounding head, a raspy throat?! Why ever not?!
As you might have guessed, I have a cold. A MAN-COLD to be exact! The sort of cold that Mummies hardly ever get. Mummies usually just get Mummy colds. You know, where they sniff and cough their way through the house, dragging their weary body from chore to chore, quietly suffering. This time, though, I have a man-cold. The sort that leaves you weak, shaky, and moaning. The type where you find yourself lying on the couch for a few minutes, to arise an hour later only out of dire necessity (bathroom, or food!). Man colds are nasty things. By all accounts they are viscious. They take colds to a level most women never experience. Well, I can now tell you all about them. And in case you were wondering, it was my darling husband who told me, ever so graciously, that I have a man-cold! I don't mind. He stayed home from work yesterday and looked after Munchkin all day, leaving his exhausted wife to lie on the bed, the couch, or the armchair, sniff, and moan to her heart's content. Munchkin did think it was a bit odd that Mummy was recumbent for so long. He wanted to bring things to her, to lean on her, to drool over her, to pat her with his stick (Munchkin, NO, you will hurt Mummy!).
We spent some time trying to track the progress of the cold from one relative to another...like we can accurately tell who it came from anyway! Colds are just generous. Some days it seems you simply have to THINK the word "cold" and there it is! I'm guessing my immune system is a bit tired. Surprise, surprise. And the really sweet slice and drink of coke and icecream on Friday afternoon won't have helped one bit. Punishment for a sweet delight? Oh, how I wish I could go back and choose nachos or something in the hopes of adverting the cold!
This morning finds me upright, and heading out to do grocery shopping. Why, I ask myself, do I always seem to end up with a cold when it is time to do the monthly grocery shop?!?
Anyone want to share in my bounty? Surely you have a secret, burning desire to sniff and moan your way through a few days?! No?? Oh, fine then, I will try and keep my cold to myself. But I'm warning you; colds are notoriously generous. Never stingy.